What a week!

I have to say that last week was one of the most challenging weeks I have ever had. In Institute this week my teacher talked about being put in 'the press' and how school and life and teachers etc. can press us. I felt VERY pressed. Pressed to the point of tears, more than once.
Last week I decided that taking 18 credits was insane and I was going to withdraw from one of my classes and take it in May. There were a few bumps getting to the point where I could actually go and do it, which caused a lot of distress. Plus my Professor for Sr Art show decided that she wanted us to have our exhibition outline with sketches and plans and examples ready by Tuesday (today). Of course add a ton of reading and other art projects and assignments mixed in with stress and some emotions and you get Alanna freaking out to the point of feeling depressed.

Of course I got through it! It was difficult, but I did. With help. Over the weekend I was still feeling emotionally worn out, tired and depressed. I went to visit my brother who has been going through a very difficult emotional time. So mix the two of us together for the weekend and you have me going a bit crazy.
While I was there trying to support my brother, I was reading my scriptures and felt that I needed to ask myself some questions. First, I asked myself "what is making me feel this way, and is it a rational feeling?" I noticed that some of my feelings were irrational and I knew that I needed to be patient and to think positively, so that helped me to identify the things that were bothering me. Second, I asked myself "What can I learn from these trials?" Some things I came up with were faith, patience, endurance, and relying on the Lord.
Last I asked myself "Have I talked to the Lord about this and asked for comfort?" another question to go with that is "How much have you relied on the Lord?" I realized that although I pray regularly I was not having the faith that I needed, and I wasn't asking for what I really needed. I needed to ask Heavenly Father for his comfort and help. And I did. The peace that came to my mind and heart were indescribable. I was able to think clearly and I was given the peace that I needed. In James 1:3 is says that the trying of our faith worketh patience, and I know that part of life is being patient for the Lord's time and being patient in general. But it also means that sometimes our faith needs to be tried, by going through the press.

I am so grateful for prayer! I know the God loves all of His children and He wants us to be happy! If we communicate with Him, then he is better able to bless us. If we ask for comfort, he shall give it.

Although last week was a nightmare, I know that I can learn a lot of things from it that can and will bless my life. How grateful I am for that knowledge! Now I just need to keep reminding myself :) and keep relying on the Lord! It's always easier to see the blessing from a trial when you're past it, rather than when you're in it. That's why we must Endure to the End! We sure have a lot to endure in this life, but the eternal rewards make up for it ten fold.

I have a lot of decisions to make in my life, and I know that some of those cannot be answered at this time. I have a lot to do and stress and feeling sad do NOT help with the creative process. I am happy, I am blessed and I am SO GRATEFUL for my friends and family who are there for me and support me through everything! You really are wonderful :)